I’m sitting here and shaking my head. Wow, seriously? You publish a rehashed Twilight fanfiction and this suddenly qualifies you to do a writing guide?
You know, I think I might be the square here. I must be out of the loop. I had no idea when it was that expressions of estrogen got to be considered quality writing. Seriously, I missed that memo. The original Twilight was bad enough, and I will never get back the 4 hours I spent reading that tripe of a series on a lost bet. I refused to even consider reading Fifty Shades after I found out what it was based on, and doing the random-page test (go to bookstore, open to a random page, read it) only bolstered that impression.
And she’s releasing a writing guide? On what, how to make money off bad fanfiction? Really, inquiring minds want to know. Or is it the BDSM factor? Several of my author colleagues dabble in erotic fiction, and trust me, they can write that ridiculously bad scene I read out of Fifty Shades into the ground. EL James’s story is what someone I know has aptly named “Instant Mashed Potatoes”, in terms of “just add hormones for instant sales”.
Look, I released four books, and I can tell you one thing: I will not be releasing a writing guide anytime soon. Why? Because I don’t think I’m qualified. My books got good reviews. My plot structures improved vastly over the past seven years that I worked on The Index Series. I’d like to think I’m doing a good job, yes, but I do not feel that my work has been sufficient enough to properly qualify me to release a guide on anything related to writing and publishing. Maybe once I wrap the series up, at Book 20 (or 30!), I’ll consider it. But after doing one arc, no way in hell.
And who knows, maybe EL James can really write. All we know of her is the Fifty Shades trainwreck. If she releases a book that’s completely unrelated to Fifty Shades and it’s good, then I’ll gladly give props where they are due. Then again, if it’s anything like Stephenie Meyer and The Host, which is only barely more palatable than The Series That Shall Not Be Mentioned, then I am not optimistic.
Hey, I write a series too, but you know what, far be it from me to claim that I’m adept enough at writing to release a how-to on it. I wish. Maybe in a decade or two. But only when I know for a given fact that I have learned what I’ll be talking about. I severely doubt that EL James is qualified to talk about writing when her success is based on a fanfiction. I mean, isn’t that considered coattailing?
Good grief. I feel the same sort of say what?! that I felt when Stephenie Meyer tried to claim that Bella Swan was a strong character. Puh-lease. You want strong character? Meet Kataria from my series. Meet Eleanor from Chronicles of Charanthe. Meet Elizabeth Woodville as written by Philippa Gregory. Meet Katniss Everdeen from The Hunger Games. But not that sparkle-loving twit.